A Look in The Mirror

Recently a lot of awareness against body shaming has surfaced on the internet yet it still is a major problem that teenagers, irrespective of their gender, face today. The term body shaming means to degrade or mock someone on the basis of their physical appearance. It actually has a very wide scope, it can include mocking someone’s size, height, hair, weight, muscularity and even facial features. There are three ways of body shaming - one is mocking someone’s appearance in front of them, then comes doing that behind someone’s back and the most dangerous type of body shaming is probably when we become our own critiques and compare ourselves to others. 

Why do people body shame? When we are arguing with someone, sometimes the easiest way to hurt them is probably by making fun of their appearance. Instead of conveying emotions appropriately, some people end up taking personal jabs at each other and others think it’s funny. When did it become funny to call out a person on their body?

Most of us have some insecurities about ourselves and, when someone actually makes fun of them, we start overthinking and judging ourselves. ‘It was just a joke’, is often used to justify body shaming but we don't realise the gravity of those words. Body shaming can cause people's self-esteem to drop and some people may even develop anxiety, eating disorders and/or depression. The worst part is that sometimes our own friends or family members constantly remind us about what we (wrongly) think are our ‘flaws’. Even I scrutinise my body and wonder why I can't have the ‘perfect’ body or flawless skin - I’m pretty sure most of us do. We feel the need to be a certain way and ‘fix’ our bodies.

Words keep echoing in our minds - ’too fat’, ‘too thin’, ‘why do you have such imperfect skin?’. Societal standards and notions of what is pretty and what is not have tampered with how we see ourselves. Why is the notion of beauty in women to have an hourglass figure, the perfect curves with flawless skin and, for men, muscular bodies, broad shoulders and 6-pack abs.

After googling the term ‘ugly’, you’ll get caricaturish images of people with acne, buck teeth, facial deformities, or spectacles. These things are natural and we don’t have any control over them so why are they deemed ugly? 

When you google beautiful you get images of models, which clearly portrays the unrealistic standards for beauty. The media - something we all consume on a daily basis - plays a huge role in setting those stereotypes. We all watch models and actors who have ‘perfect bodies’ but we don’t realise how a major part of their life is maintaining themselves by constantly dieting or working out. Yet even they cannot escape body shaming by trolls on social media. Behind magazine covers, we don’t see the hours put into editing and the use of professional photography. The reality is that even celebrities feel compelled to have surgeries or look younger. That's how problematic these set standards are. The concept of ‘plus-size’ really enrages me as well, because when we give someone that tag we are setting standards for an ideal size. This is really messed up. All of us have been pulled into this never-ending mad race for perfection, until and unless we embrace ourselves.

While scrolling through my Instagram feed, I see various trends. Some are positive and show us the deceptive side of social media. However at the same time there are so many toxic trends on Instagram. One is where people use makeup to draw facial hair and acne on their face and, later, completely transform their face using makeup. It essentially conveys that these features are flaws. When people with over a thousand followers engage in such toxic and shallow trends they don’t realise how many viewers get influenced. Even in some of the commercial movies the main character has to undergo a makeover after which countless people start drooling over them. This really gives people the wrong idea. No one has to change how they look for someone else. 

Everybody is unique and that's what makes them beautiful. It's time we give our mind-set a makeover and change the restrictive definition of beauty. We define our beauty, not society. We all need to accept and realise that all body types are beautiful. Why should anyone hesitate to wear what they want? Our bodies are not meant to fit into clothes, clothes have to fit us. Read that again. 
Instead of bringing down someone because of their weight or size or features let’s uplift each other. Instead of saying ‘you should eat more’ or ‘you should eat less’, we can remind each other about how beautiful we are. Rather than judging a person based on their physical appearance, we should see them as humans, as individuals. 

Our bodies undergo countless changes but it's our home and it's time we start loving it. We can always work on ourselves but we have to make sure that it's because we love our bodies not  because we hate them. Take baby steps, find something you like about your body and compliment yourself.
So when we look in the mirror now, let's be kind to the person we see and accept them and know that they are beautiful.